Scorpio Full Moon 5/14 Life's Balance

I hope the height of spring is being kind to you. I hope the last two weeks have brought you much needed light and celebration. I hope you have been able to get outside and enjoy the abundance and beauty that surrounds our side of the planet this time of year. The new moon in Taurus was just what we needed after an eclipse cycle and an intense celestial alignments. And even though I have found some relief in the blue skies, warm sun and fresh flowers and fruits, I cannot help but feel Taurus's astrological partner bearing down.

Taurus and the celebration of fertility, Beltane, is directly across the wheel from Scorpio, and the celebration of death, Samhain. During the Taurus new moon, which happens mid-spring, we get a taste of life's balance as the moon reaches her zenith. Pluto, the ruler of Scorpio is closer to us now than he usually is, as he is the furthest planet and takes the longest to go around the sun. Pluto has been a part of many of the current changes and crises and as king of the underworld, shaman of transformation, holder of power and teacher in death, sex and renewal, he casts a mighty shadow amidst the brilliant light of spring.

I am trying to focus on the beauty of life, the blessings, the gifts, the miracles. But it's hard to focus on the bountiful farmer's market when the honey bees that make it possible are facing mass extinction at our hands, or the flirtatious frolics of Beltane when more than 200 young girls have been kidnapped in Nigeria. It's hard to celebrate the mother giving birth when I want to mourn the mother who has lost a child.

I have also been reading a lot about the state of our planet in an Eco activism course and while I try to focus on all the good happening and the people committed to a sustainable future, it's hard to read statistics and stories about poison, pollution, greed, corruption, birth defects, GMO's and not feel sick and hopeless. But this is the balance of life.

There is no light, without darkness, growth without decay, birth without death. Without struggle, how do we change? Without challenge, how do we rise? Without winter, how would we appreciate summer? I have been taught that while in human form, there will always be duality. This is what we sign up for when we come here. The secret that Pluto forces into the light on this full moon, is that we have to look at the darkness and the light. We have to see them, know them, honor them both. It's okay to wail when tragedy occurs, or throw up when you read about something that devastates you. We don't need to ignore it or become De-sensitized. We also don't need to become violent ourselves and cause more harm.

Empathy is one of the most important lessons we can learn, and the sooner we learn it, the sooner our world changes for the better. Pluto is not going anywhere. There will always be things we cannot control or understand or like. But there is a balance. The balance that comes from grieving with grace, being of service, being grateful, being real. Because shit is getting real.

The Scorpio full moon is not all darkness. It is also said to be the moon Buddha was born under and because of that, it holds more potential than any other to transmute negativity and connect to divinity.

Deal with your darkness on this full moon. Cry, rage, stomp, scream. Grieve, mourn, weep, share your story, struggles, disappointments and angers. Then be still. Thing about the gifts, the life still happening all around you. Offer a prayer, a song, or silence to the moon. Ask for the balance needed to walk this world in a good way, an awake way, an empathic, compassionate, loving way.

There is no way to get rid of the shadow. There is no way to get rid of the death in life. But there is a way to live in beauty, no matter what. As always, it is our choice how we receive and respond to these cycles.

I want to offer you a couple mantras as blessings on this full moon. If you feel inclined, chant them. Chanting is very powerful. They are both from Buddhist traditions, which feels appropriate, too. The translations for these vary, fyi, but it is more about how you feel when you say it.

The first is longer and one I use for Samhain/Scorpio cycle in October:
Gate Gate Paragate Parasamgate Bodhi Swaha
(Gone gone gone beyond, gone completely beyond, into awakeness, so be it.)

The second is shorter and is said to encompass all of the Buddha's teachings:
Om Mani Padme Hum
(Homage to the pearl in the Lotus)
So much love and light to you and all the world!
#bringbackourgirls

3/1/2014 Pisces New Moon INTEGRATION

Is anyone else feeling fragmented? I am sure some of it is the fact that for 7+ months, I have not slept for longer than 3 hours in a row, and rather than there being a definitive end to one day and a beginning to the next, I have been flowing through hour by hour, breath by breath. And, of course, we all just had 3 weeks of Mercury Retrograde in airy Aquarius, which turned my brain upside down.

Regardless, fragmented was the word that came to my mind when I tried to still myself enough to write this email. I think we all experience fragmentation in some way or another. Whether it manifests as a disconnect between body and mind, or mind and emotions or emotions and spirit or any variation therein, most of us tend to feel like we are two (or more) people, living multiple lives, playing many roles. It can be exhilarating and exhausting to realize we use our energy so broadly, but at some point, we realize we lack the "bandwidth" (my new favorite expression) to sustain our intention.

Now is a good time to become aware of this fragmentation. Mercury goes direct the day before this new moon. Soon enough, we will be at Spring equinox and Aries will be demanding action and the time will be ripe for manifesting the dreams of winter. But for the next 28 days, we need to learn to balance collective consciousness (Aquarius) with personal power (Aries) through the mutable waters of Pisces.

Pisces is the last of the Zodiac signs and is considered the oldest. She is said to contain a little bit of every sign and that she can empathize with every other element because her energy is that of rain, or a waterfall or the fast flowing river. She moves through and with all the other elements and in fact is created by the relationship between them. Fragmentation cannot exist with Pisces because she is everything. There is no separation.

One of my teachers, Lynn Andrews, says, "The first lesson of power is that we are alone." We learn this as the wheel begins with Aries, independence, personal strength, setting individual goals. "The last lesson of power is that we are all one." Through the year's twists and turns, through the experiencing of each cycle and sign, we all come to this place, the realm of Pisces, where it no longer seems so important to stand alone or be the "one." We are tired, weary and have been from the roots of earth to the cosmos of space and just want time to heal and rest before it all starts again.

This is not the cycle for big decisions, changes or excessive business. This is the cycle for writing down dreams, gazing at the clouds and the stars, meditating on waves or dancing in the rain. Let yourself be complete. Even though we all have work we want to do, can we sense that it is already within us? And that the outer journey is just the chance to re-member that fullness? Additionally, we cannot truly absorb or embody our new endeavors if we don't first finish downloading all the work already done. We have all come a long way and transformed so much in so many ways. Stop, and let it sink in. Stop, and welcome the integration.

Integration can occur in many ways: You may sense it through the body, so take time to do yoga, dance, get a massage or take a spa trip to support the process. Sometimes we get sick just so the body can rest and absorb all the information! Often we feel it through dreams, which Pisces rules, so this is a good month to start a dream journal. Or it can come through emotions so welcome tears when they arise, even if it is unexpected. Pisces can be quite mysterious and works through intuition, so really honor your gut this month, particularly around self-care.

As with every cycle, if we can really invite the sign into our lives, if we surrender to the current flow, we feel the support. Suddenly, even fragmented sleep is enough to get us through the day or a lingering cough/cold magically disappears, or the missing piece in a current struggle becomes as obvious as the light of day. I know we have big goals and that the desire to "spring" forward is strong. But Pisces is here, at this time, for our highest good. The universe put her between Aquarius and Aries for a reason, and that reason is integration. Just as the water will slowly change everything she touches, there is nothing that Pisces cannot absorb into herself. The hurts, challenges, questions, defeats will all melt into the center, along with joys, truths, loves and victories. We are alone and we are all one. There is a season for owning each of these statements, and now is the time to surrender to oneness. Don't think about, just allow it. Pisces will do the rest.

May Pisces bless you, cleanse you and heal you. May she journey with you in dreams and tears and support you in integrating all aspects of yourself, that we may greet the spring wholly refreshed, renewed and ready for the next steps.

dada Sax pcy,fldx
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Leo Full Moon 2/14/14 LOVE LOVE LOVE

Every astrologerish blurb I have seen or read for this upcoming full moon is tied to the fact that the Full Moon in Leo, our fixed fire, lioness, sacred sun sign, falls on Valentine's day.

I am no different. Though I have never done a whole lot of celebration on Valentine's day for a number of reasons, I know that in our society, this is the holiday that encourages love and affection, and big shows of it, at that. That is definitely what Leo is about! She is the sun, shining her light on everyone, encouraging us to take the stage and sign, dance, play, to shout our heart's desire from the rooftop!

It is so interesting to me that so far, 2014 brought Capricorn in on NY Day, the perfect harmony of astrology with our calendar, and then does it again in February, letting Leo fill our hearts and inspire our spirits on the biggest candy/flower day of the year.

But this is a full moon, not a new moon, and however Aquarius and Mercury retrograde in Aquarius is shaking up your world and forcing you to step out of the comfort zone, Leo is here to warm you up, make you purr and get loving, happy and grateful for all the wonderful things in your life.

My recommendation is to not give in to the easy box of chocolates, bottle of wine and dinner V-day deal. Make it creative, powerful and about your love for self and others, not just one other. Valentines has also become the day of reckoning for "V day" inspired by Eve Ensler's Vagina Monologues and last year, the movement "One billion rising" was launched (onebillionrising.org) which uses flash dances and art to bring awareness for women and girls. Or Jonathan Goldman made 2/14 "World Sound Healing day." (healingsounds.com)
This is the power of Leo.

What do you love? Who do you love? How can Aquarius/Leo help you to really show that love in a way that benefits all beings? Like the blessed sun in the winter sky, offering heat where it is so desperately needed, let the Valentines full moon fire you up and create an earth full of sacred flames with love, love, love lighting their way.

When I first saw Valentine's was on Leo Full Moon, my mind filled with the lyrics of the Beatles (who just celebrated their 50 year appearance in the US) and so I close with sharing a truly Leo-inspired message and send so much love to you and yours! Many Blessings!

All You Need is Love
The Beatles
Lennon/McCartney
Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love.
There's nothing you can do that can't be done.
Nothing you can sing that can't be sung.
Nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the game It's easy.
There's nothing you can make that can't be made.
No one you can save that can't be saved.
Nothing you can do but you can learn how to be you in time - It's easy.
All you need is love, all you need is love,
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.
Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love.
All you need is love, all you need is love,
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.
There's nothing you can know that isn't known.
Nothing you can see that isn't shown.
Nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be. It's easy.
All you need is love, all you need is love,
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.
All you need is love (all together now)
All you need is love (everybody)
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.

Aquarius New Moon 1/30/14~ The Web

I have been thinking a lot about friends, relationships, needs and community in general. Maybe it is the residue from the Cancer full moon this month. Mama Cancer brings up what we need and how we need to feel loved, comforted, safe. Or maybe it is simply that so much of my life and priorities have shifted since I became a mother. Either way, relationships, how to be in relationships and what it means to be in relationships are on my mind.

Friends have always been one of the most important things to me. From an early age, I preferred my "chosen" family over my real family. I didn't come from a strict or unkind home, quite the opposite, but the Gemini in me sought popularity, new faces and socializing more than developing closeness with my kin. Even though that has changed some as I have grown older, seen the importance in my family and understand how different those connections are, my friends and community still ranked pretty close to number one on my priority list.

A lot has transformed since I got pregnant and even more so since baby was born. Suddenly, this new soul is number one and even that second slot seems miles beneath the first. I now understand that maternal emotional Cancerian calling in a way I never imagined, fathomed or even desired. I had no idea I would love this kid so much or that I would want to be with him constantly. Everything else just kinda falls away. I don't mean it to, I try to be aware, be present, be kind to those around me. It is just hard. This shift is not just for parents, it can happen anytime you suddenly commit yourself to a new calling or presence.

So I am tired and obsessed. I am overwhelmed. It is easy to stay home with the kid when I don't have to be somewhere. And it is just easier to hang out with other moms, or with no one at all. Suddenly the excitement I felt around social events, networking, even lunches and mani/pedis feels like work and even talking on the phone is an impossibility.

On the other side, Gemini human that I still am, a part of me feels like I need more help and connection now; and it's hard not to just pick up the phone when I want something or someone. Oh, the selflessness in serving another human and the selfishness of still being one!

I find myself being afraid of sounding selfish or needy and then I don't reach out at all. I wonder what the point is of trying to maintain my standing in the community or my friendships. It is not a comfortable place to be. I don't know what the solution is or even if one really exists. Perhaps I just need a shift in my perception.

Enter, as always, the new moon. Aquarius, fixed air, is the sign of community. She is the weaver of the web, the social director that stands back and sees how the event can be unique and wonderful. She is smart and effortlessly maintains all the pieces that need to be woven and the balls that need to be juggling. She does what she does for the highest good, the collective consciousness and the much bigger picture. It's not just about her, or any single person or linear list of persons. She is concerned with all beings.

She is also a little aloof, detached and ambivalent to the emotional needs and desires of others. Aquarius new moon following the Cancer full moon is about as different as it gets, but both are pertinent players in the game of life.

Cancer allows us to drop into that place of overwhelming need and feeling. She forces us to look at the uncomfortable emotions around family, life and what brings us closeness and comfort. Compared to Capricorn, the new moon cycle ending, and Aquarius, the one beginning, she is the almost intolerably needy but necessary.

Capricorn turned our attention towards the active, masculine, anchoring energies of manifestation, and now Aquarius, who is neither feminine nor masculine, but rather androgynous in her universality and preferences, has us step back from father/mother and into the realm of simply being human. Rather than labeling and demanding roles, expectations and results, Aquarius steps back, shrugs and says "what is needed for the benefit of all? Not for just you to succeed (Capricorn) and for you to feel good (Cancer) but for everyone to live just a little bit more happily?"

I, too, have to step back. Being a mom is amazing. But being a wife, daughter, sister, friend, teacher, student and mother feels overwhelming. I know many of you relate, we all wear so many masks! Can we just come back to being human? And can we behave as we want other humans to behave, without attachment or expectation? Can we soften the guilt, anger, love, resentment and fear and just breathe? Aquarius is air, after all. Can we just do, one day at a time, the best we can do and what needs to be done for the highest good for all of us?

It is a tough request, one that requires contemplation and the intelligence that comes from the higher mind, not the primal brain or ego. After all, how can we be human and know the highest good? That is the Aquarian think-outside-the-box paradox and it requires both a humbling acceptance of our finite, flawed nature and the nature of others, a willingness to still want to take actions that benefit all the beings in spite of that nature and then a surrender to something greater, even if it is just the idea that there is something greater than our needs. It is in this process that the higher purpose is revealed. But it is subtle and as it is in the realm of air, it is a brief glimpse, a breath, of the highest consciousness, and then the humanness returns.

Many of us can't or won't meet the challenge. That's okay, Aquarius does not judge. She just keeps weaving the web and knows you will find a place in the fabrics, when you are ready. The web is not neat and not always beautiful, it's magic is in the fact that it simply keeps growing, regardless of the imperfections and mistakes. She just keeps weaving it, finding the exquisiteness in creation and connection, in just being human, aware of our humanness, doing the best we can with other humans, one intricate, complicated stitch at a time, one breath at a time.

I breathe in, and I forgive myself for my desires, expectations, flaws and shortcomings. I exhale and I forgive others for theirs. In that fixed space between the inhale and exhale, the exhale and inhale, I pause, and ask Aquarius, higher consciousness, what next step needs to be taken, for the highest good of all. The weaver keeps weaving and the web grows stronger.

Sending you all love and blessings on this new moon, the second one in January, considered to be auspicious by many in terms of potent beginnings (There is no new moon in February in 2014, but two again in March, it will be a powerful spring, but more on that later); also Happy Chinese new year, year of the horse! As time starts to gallop by, do pause in your breath and ask to be guided. May we all remember our humanness, our connection and trust everyone is doing the best they can. Bekah

Capricorn New Moon 1/1/14~ Auspicious Beginnings

I don't tend to follow our agreed upon western calendar in terms of cycles or seasons. I still prefer the moon and the earth to guide me there. The idea that January 1st is the new year has never made any real sense to me energetically. January is such a dreary month anyway and I like either celebrating solstice or even Chinese new year for a new beginning. But 2014 is a little different because the first new moon of the year happens to fall on new year's day. And it is not just any new moon, it is Capricorn, the queen of the mountain, initiator of winter, earth element in it's most powerful and challenging.

To me, who tries to honor cycle, season, moon, earth, intuition, spirit and goddess, there is something incredibly auspicious about this line up. Particularly as we are coming out of such a hard year. There are challenges ahead, don't get me wrong, 2014 will have it's bumps and ebbs, but I don't know; when I look at the little new moon symbol in Capricorn next to January 1st on my calendar, it gives me butterflies.

The Capricorn new moon is the best of the year to start foundational work. This is the sign of resolutions, making plans and mapping the course. As so many already use Jan 1st as the day of new beginnings, having the strength of Capricorn behind it makes me feel like those intentions might have the ability to manifest better than usual, and they also run the risk of holding us more accountable than usual. Saturn rules Capricorn and Saturn is big daddy planet, the strict father figure of astrology that keeps us in line and has no qualms about forcing us back on the horse, or goat, rather, when we either fall or jump off.

This is a new moon to really take some time to decide what your true goals are for the year to come. This is not the year to write down those resolutions you just write because you always do (make a million dollars, get married, lose 50 lbs) unless you truly intend to get to work. Saturn and Capricorn are listening this time and you don't want to to tell them something you don't mean because they do not have a sense of humor or think not following through is funny. At all.

I recommend getting out on the earth this new year's day. Walk to the park, or better, climb a hill or mountain. Sit or stand with feet or sit bones firmly on the ground, connecting you to her strength. Consider your physical world, (Capricorn is best for goals around the physical and material) What do you really want? What is your long term dream, the top of the mountain, so to speak? What actions can you take to get there? What do you really need to live the life you want?

Be serious. be practical but also, believe in yourself. Believe you have the ability and support to achieve your goals this year. Tell the earth and the moon that you are ready and willing to do what needs to be done. If you are clear and diligent in your intentions, Capi and Saturn are two of the best allies you could ever want and you will get to the top in 2014.

I wish you, and all beings, a prosperous and auspicious new moon and new year.